Book One: Chapter Five

Gillian yawned and stretched in her chair; she rubbed her tired eyes and smiled.
“I think it’s time for lunch don’t you?” Gillian looked over at Dawn and noticed that she was scribbling furiously in her pearl coloured notebook.
“How is it coming along Dawn?” She rose and walked over to where Dawn was sitting, she nodded and finished off the last sentence “…at the back of her mind was Joel, her first love.”
“I have written down everything you’ve said Mum, I haven’t left out a word…shorthand obviously! Now I know that when my grandchildren ask me about our history I will be able to tell them” Dawn smiled as Gillian patted her on her shoulder.
“So that shorthand course wasn’t a complete waste of time ey? Come, let’s go and eat. I’ll continue later on after I have had a rest. This part of the story is nearly over.”
After lunch and an afternoon nap Gillian called Dawn to her room, she climbed in with her Mother and prepared her notebook. Gillian began to tell the story again…


xxx


 One morning before the birds had woken from their chilly branch-swung slumber, Esme was awake. She had a huge decision to make. It was obvious from Joseph’s attentions that he was intending to become betrothed to her. In his favour, he was a generous, kind and warm person. He made her laugh, he treated her royally. He was a true friend. Against his favour, he was considerably older than she was and as of yet it didn’t really show. But she knew that within five years or more he would be an old man, while she would be in the prime of her life.

She tossed and turned, twisting between anxious consciousness and fretful sleep. Her heart still hoped for the return of Joel to Thorngate, but it had been at least two years since his departure and it was another three till his return. She was not sure that it was wise to wait for him, what if he never returned? What if he returned with another woman on his arm? She would be an old maid and no man would want her. She desired to have children and to have a loving husband. She knew that Joseph would be excellent at being both but also knew that she would never fully eradicate her love for Joel. Her Joel.

When the sun started to rise into the rosy pale blue of morning, Esme stepped out onto the landing and quickly walked down the passage holding her lantern high to see where she was going, for although the sun was showing its face outside, the thick velvet curtains let no light into the depths of Thorngate. When she reached the top of the curved main staircase she stopped as if someone had called her name, she looked back over her shoulder and then stepped out.
She tripped and stumbled forward.
Mrs. Dodd had left a corner of the carpet raised across the stairs, and Esme’s foot caught in it as she stepped out onto the top step. She let out a short cry as she fell forward, her hands grabbed frantically at fresh air as she tried to stop the inevitable. She fell heavily onto her side and rolled out of control down the entire length of the stairs, her head slammed into one of the twin pillars and she came to a stop at the base of the stairs. She opened her eyes slowly and tried to move but she couldn’t. She shouted out for help, but her lips merely opened and closed. No sounds came from her mouth. Her weakening eyes became unfocussed and the last thing she saw was the portrait of Rupert and Robert smiling down at her from the wall above the large wall clock.

When Dawn walked down the passage she noticed the carpet and bent to straighten it, muttering about the dangers of such things. As she made her way down she saw the frill of Esme’s skirt at the bottom of the stairs; she started to hurry down towards her and when she came into full view of Esme she screamed for help. She knelt beside Esme who regained light consciousness, trying to get up. Rosalyn arrived and held her down not allowing her to move.

Esme suffered a loss of sensation in her lower body but the doctor said that it was just from a bruising of the spine. The good news was that it was temporary and that she would be back to normal in weeks. She was confined to bed and had to rest as much as possible to allow for maximum healing. Mrs. Dodd was given the task of caring for her and this she did with uncharacteristic tenderness and love. Her arms and body had to be moved at least three times a day; her legs had to be massaged to encourage circulation. She rested and used the time to read, sleep and plan her life.

Throughout the time that she was bedridden Joseph never visited her once. He sent letters to her explaining that he was abroad doing business in France, then in Italy, then Spain and could not get back to see her. She was in bed for over a month and within weeks of that month she was walking with the aid of a walking stick. She spent her days sitting in the rose arbour thinking of Joel and Joseph, trying to make a decision between the two of them.
When Joseph Branaugh returned from France he brought with him presents for all at Thorngate, Mrs. Dodd received an apron, embroidered with fine pictures. Deliah received a beautiful hair comb. Rosalyn was given a brush and tongs set for curling her hair and a pot of sweet smelling perfume. Esme received so many gifts that she had no room for them all. Joseph had found an exquisite violin for her. It was not for playing but more suited as a wall hanging. The entire body of the violin was rich black ebony wood and in a gothic style the wood was carved right through in places, so that light could shine through it. It really was a beautiful art piece and Esme thought with a sigh that Rupert would have loved it dearly. Joseph arranged for short outings each day so that Esme did not die from boredom.

Late one night Esme was sitting out in the parlour reading, she found it hard to sleep when most of her day was spent in bed. She heard the sound of a carriage outside and slowly rose to see who it was. In the moonlight she saw a cloaked figure step out of the carriage and walk towards the front door. Her heart skipped a beat and she thought for an instant that it might be…but as she opened the door she realised that it was in fact, Mr. Branaugh.
“Hello Esme, I am so sorry that I am here so late but I just had to talk with you.” He waited for her response and when she moved her hand motioning for him to enter, he walked inside. Swallowing her disappointment she shut the door behind him and followed him to the parlour.
“Joseph, I think maybe we should speak in the kitchen so that we do not wake anyone in the house" She rose and walked towards the kitchen, he followed her.
“Esme” He sat at the large wooden table and placed his hands square on the surface. “I need to say something to you” He reached out his hand and wiped a strand of steel grey hair that had fallen across his ruggedly handsome face. “You must know by now how much I care for you Esme.”
Esme sat slowly down opposite him at the other end of the table and nodded. She felt dizzy and didn’t trust her legs to hold her up.
“I know that you… care for me Joseph, you have shown me quite clearly what your intentions are” She swallowed hard and looked at the table.
“I wish to take you as my wife Esme.” He shut his eyes waiting for her response.
“Mr. Branaugh, I am flattered, really. I do, however need time to think. This is all very sudden you understand… and if you would please…” She stood and gestured that he leave. He rose and bowed stiffly to her then walked from the room. When the sounds of his carriage died away she walked back up to her room in a state of confusion. His proposal had been so devoid of passion, there was no urgency, no spark, nor fire. In an instant she was back in the garden that moonlit night and she could see Joel near her. Hear his whispered declarations of love… smell the scent of his breath, feel his hands entwined with hers. His eyes burning with such determination and excitement… her heart raced and she stopped herself, leaning her forehead against the wall. It was all too much.

Before the morning had begun, when the sky was still the colour of pewter, Esme walked out through the rose arbour and tilted her head slightly as the scent of the roses filled her senses. She stepped forward and smiled as she stared across her garden; it was hers, her land, her Thorngate. Unfortunately this morning her heart was heavy. Mr. Branaugh had asked for her hand in marriage. She knew that she was not a young woman anymore and didn’t know if anyone else would ever want her, especially since she was damaged by the fall and would never be strong again. Joel was gone, with no word or sign of returning. She sighed. Joseph was not a bad man, he was at least twenty years or more her senior, maybe more she was not sure, but he was kind and loving and would treat her well. There was only one problem. She did not love him. She wanted only Joel.
She shuddered suddenly as she heard a twig snap behind her and spun around, her eyes darting around the garden searching for a familiar face or figure.

Again she heard a sound to her left and she turned cautiously towards it ready to defend herself if she had to…
“Esme?...”
A dark cloaked figure stepped out from behind the shady arbour and advanced towards her, her breath caught in her throat and she was torn between running or fighting but….

 “…Joel?”

Silence.

“Yes.”

She rushed forward and the cloaked figure opened his arms wide to embrace her. He pulled her close to him, so hard that she thought she would faint. She lifted her head, pushed her face into his familiar neck and breathed in the sweet musky scent of him. Feeling her warmth and form in his embrace he felt a weakness that he had not known before. His warm hands felt their way around her curved neck and pulled her face towards him, he kissed her forehead, eyelids, nose, cheeks, ears, breathing her in,
“Joel!…”
“Yes, my Esme…”
“Where have you been? I have waited so long…”
“I know, I will tell you all, my darling”

After a while they sat inside the arbour seat and to Joel’s astonishment Esme retold the events of the past months; of how she had been fully reinstated as the daughter of Rupert and heir to Thorngate and of how she had fallen so badly down the stairs. He told her how he had toured and traveled Europe, but how at every turn he had thought only of her. His tour had closed earlier than expected and he had hoped to visit Rupert on his return.
“Joel, I must ask this one question.” Esme reached out and plucked a small flower that had become entangled in Joel’s long, thick, dark hair and smiled in a teasing way, “Why on earth were you hiding in the rose arbour?”
He chuckled and blushed, looking a little foolish, “Well, you see Esme; I’ve been here for over an hour, I came straight from the Train Station. I was trying to pluck up the courage to walk to the door and ‘boldly’ ask to meet with you formally but, when I arrived here my nerve failed me. I was half considering leaving, only half…Esme, when you arrived here and took my breath away.”
He looked deeply into her eyes and moved forward slowly to place a gentle kiss on her lips; she pulled away and blushed.
“Joel, I… I’ve never kissed anyone before.” She looked away from him but he gently reached out his hand, and touching her chin he turned her head slowly to face him.
“My darling Esme, my beloved angel, I will not kiss you if you do not desire it.” He smiled at her and she felt as though her heart would burst forth from within her.
“It’s not that at all my love, I’m just not sure I am able to.” She looked up at him and the sincerity and innocence in her face astounded him even more. He put his arms around her, drawing her towards him. His eyes searched hers for any fear but in their inky depths he saw only fire. Their lips met in a perfect kiss, gently at first but with growing passion until he had to pull away from her breathlessly. She looked concerned but he smiled,
“My dear Esme, you please me more than you could ever believe!” He laughed, and she giggled a sweet melodic sound that bubbled out of her joy, they embraced for a long while and then rose from the seat to walk arm in arm back to Thorngate, her Thorngate.

When they told the family there was much rejoicing, Dawn had always admired Joel’s kind nature and could not hope for a better son-in-law, Rosalyn, Mrs. Dodd, and Deliah were also very pleased and the dinner held that night was a joyous one. Later after dinner, Joel and Esme walked hand in hand to the large painting of Rupert that hung over the staircase and stood before it. Joel looked at Esme and smiled,
“Before I marry you I have to do one thing.” He kissed her lightly on the forehead and faced the painting, “Mr. Edgar-Harrison, I am here to tell you that I have asked for your daughter’s hand in marriage, I intend to look after her and cherish her in every way. I also want you to know that I have loved her since the day I saw her and that I would have still married her even if we had never known who she really is. I truly, truly love her. I ask now for your blessing.”
He smiled impishly and looked at Esme, they waited for a few seconds and then shrugged – silence was better than a negative answer!
They stood arm in arm looking intently at the painting,
“I think he would have been very pleased.” Esme sighed, looking at Joel who nodded his agreement. “He knows that you will take care of Thorngate with me.” She smiled as she spoke and Joel looked down at her,
“I’m not quite sure what to make of what just happened but if that is what you think then so be it. We have his blessing.”

They sent a message to Joseph to propose a meeting; he arrived the very next day without a return letter. They all sat in the parlour; Joseph facing them, pale and drawn, hands clasped, sitting far forward in his chair.
“Joseph…” Esme coughed a little behind a gloved fist. “When you asked me to be your bride, you faced me with a terribly difficult decision. In my heart there have only ever been two men, Joel McKinnon and Joseph Branaugh. Joel I have loved, since I was a young girl, only eighteen. And you…well I have become fond of you these last few months. I have valued your friendship tremendously Joseph but…” She turned to look at Joel before resuming.
“I have only ever really, truly loved one man. This man” She looked at Joel who smiled back at her. “Two nights ago when you left, I sat up all night thinking and evaluating. In all honesty I had to decide right there if I was prepared to wait for Joel to return or to take up your proposal of marriage. In the early morning I was still confused and when I walked out into the garden to clear my head Joel was there, waiting for me. So… I have made up my mind. I have accepted Mr. McKinnon's proposal of marriage from two years ago and we will be married in the autumn.” She fidgeted with the hair at the base of her bun. “I feel as if I need to apologize, but I will not. I have waited a good many years to be with Joel whereas you and I have only been acquaintances for a few months… I also know that you deserve to be loved - you deserve to be someone’s first choice…”

Joseph rose and picked up his walking cane bowing to them as he made to leave. Esme jumped up and stood in front of him barring his way,
“Joseph! Do not leave until we have spoken through this matter. Are you all right? Will I hear from you? We must remain friends Joseph… indefinitely.” She stood back and looked at him.
“Esme, I will be in touch with you with regards to your financial situations but I will not make an appearance at Thorngate for social reasons again. I understand your situation but I am sorely, sorely disappointed.” He brushed past her and walked out of the room without as much as a word of acknowledgement to Joel.

Later in the year as the seasons began to change again, the preparations for the wedding were well under way, with less than five days to go the house was in an uproar, the chapel was decorated with white ribbons, sheets of pale blue chiffon hung from the rafters, and the pews had been polished to sheen. Esme’s dress was completed and hanging in the main cupboard in Rupert’s old bedroom. Joel was nervous and spent a lot of time out in the garden walking and thinking, when he was not running errands for Dawn who, for the first time in years, was in charge and doing a magnificent job. For months now Rosalyn had been quietly disappearing for long stretches of time, it was only noticeable now because she was needed to help and no one could find her. The day before the wedding she arrived at Thorngate in a gilded carriage, she wore a brown velvet dress with gold embroidery and her coiled hair was dressed up in style. She walked into Thorngate and when she was noticed there was a huge commotion. Soon everyone was standing around her.

“My dear Rosalyn, what ever has happened to you?” Esme looked shocked and pleased. All of the servants edged in closer to have a look at Rosalyn's new wardrobe.
“I am married!” She smiled widely and spun around on the spot showing off her magnificent dress.
“To whom?” Everyone chorused.
“To Mr. Branaugh! We were married this morning and we came to stay the night, and, if you do not mind dear Esme, be present at your wedding. Then we will be off on our own honeymoon!”
Esme laughed out loud, clapping her hands.
“You always did have a soft spot for Joseph didn’t you Rosalyn? If my memory serves me correctly?” She ran forward and embraced Rosalyn genuinely, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “You must tell me all!”
They walked to the parlour and sat drinking tea while Rosalyn told the story of the last few months. When Joseph had left Thorngate that day he had met Rosalyn at his carriage, she had asked for a ride to town and on the journey they had chatted and laughed so much that Joseph had promised to lift her every week to town and back.
From that day onward they had enjoyed every minute they spent together and within weeks they were inseparable. They had married quietly at the parish in town and come straight to Thorngate to tell everyone.
“Rosalyn, will there be no problem that you were a house servant? Will it affect Joseph’s business at all?” Esme was concerned and Rosalyn could see that, so she patted her hand and smiled.
“No Esme, it will not be a problem. Joseph has saved wisely and has decided to retire early. We are going to travel and enjoy our time together. In foreign countries, who is to know who I was or was not?” She smiled and held Esme’s hand.
“I see, Rosalyn, I am so happy for you. I am happy for you both, Joseph is a wonderful man, and he will love you and care for you well. You deserve this after all you have done for others. Rosalyn, I still remember how you helped me the night that Robert whipped me, how you hid food for me and tended to my wounds. You were my angel and this is more than I could have ever wished for you. You and Joseph can stay at Thorngate as long as you wish. I will give you the big room overlooking the drive and rose arbour. You can help yourselves to any food you might want or you can join us all for dinner at six. It would be my pleasure. Tell Joseph that he is a lucky man to have found such a gem.” They embraced and Rosalyn went out to the carriage to fetch Joseph who had been waiting anxiously for her.

The day of the wedding dawned. The sky was the clearest blue and the trees were the brightest green. Esme was up early and within minutes of her stirring, her servants arrived to ready her for her big day. She climbed into the wooden bath tub filled with hot lavender water, her hair was gently washed through with honey and lemon juice and her face was scrubbed till her cheeks were rosy. Her hairstyle alone took over an hour to finish, white flowers were woven into the thick plaits of hair that were wrapped around her head. Little sparkling gems were placed in her hair and she wore a delicate white lace choker around her slender neck, decorated alternately with diamonds and pearls. When her dress was brought in there were gasps of pleasure all around. They laced up her bodice and she stepped into the hoop petticoat that would hold up the soft white layers of her skirt. The train of her skirt was embroidered with small white flowers like the ones in her hair. Hundreds of pearls were stitched into her bodice and her veil was trimmed with the finest Dutch lace. Her slippers were made from fine white silk, with a slight heel and the white flower design all over them. She wore a diamond tiara and the overall effect was magnificent.

When the organ began to play the guests rose and turned to see the bride. There was an audible sigh and the ladies immediately started dabbing their eyes with handkerchiefs. As Joel’s eyes landed on Esme he felt his heart swell with the love that he felt for her, she shimmered in an angelic way, the light falling golden through the layers of her veil and dress, highlighting the gems and pearls in her hair. She was the most exquisite thing he had ever seen. She looked up at him and for a brief moment their eyes locked on one another. When she stood before him and smiled up at him he was the happiest man on earth.

After the ceremony the guests walked up the long walkway to the main house. The ballroom was set up with platter after platter of delicious food; there was a stuffed boar with an apple in its mouth surrounded by roasted vegetables as the centerpiece and wine for everyone. The festivities went on late into the night with much merry music and dancing.

Late the next morning, waved off by all of the staff, Esme and Joel left for Italy on their honeymoon. Finally Joel would be able to show her all of the beautiful things that he had told her about. They drove out of Thorngate, away from the rose arbour, down the sweeping cobblestone driveway, past the tall trees, the chapel, the schoolhouse and out onto the road. Esme looked at Joel, her beloved husband, and knew deep down in her heart that she had made the right choice. She reached for her necklace, clasping the beautiful pendant that Rupert had given to Dawn many years ago when they were first married; Dawn had given it to her as a gift from Rupert, on their wedding day. She held the pendant in her hand and smiled as the crystals glistened looking brand new. Joel squeezed her hand and smiled at her as they traveled on into the first day of their new life together.





“The End“